His Honour Sandor Clegane
by TheDeliquent9
Summary: What happens when Elder Brother gets Sandor to fill in for him on a court case involving a certain Little Bird's marriage? He gets too fond of hitting the table with the gavel of course. Idea is not mine neither is ASoIF. SanSan. Oneshot.


The morning light of the Quiet Isle turned through open windows, rolling into the courtroom. They day was lovely, splendid in fact. There was a hum of birds and bees alike that wandered outside cheerfully. The courtroom seats only company was the light that shone on them lazily as they warmed in their sun bath. It was all peaceful and quiet with not a care for the world, who sat on the iron chair, who's side were this family on, who's raised their banners or whether the bread's price had risen. However at the end of the courtroom there was a dark foreboding aura that seeped into any gaiety the day was experiencing.

Sandor Clegane shifted uncomfortably in Elder Brother's court chair, clawing at the long robes and adjusting his hood like a weasel in an ill fitting suit of armour. He cricked his neck already stiff from sitting in the hard wooden chair and adjusted himself to scratch a buttock impatiently before tossing the gavel in his hand and doing a few practice hits on the mahogany table in front of him. He wasn't enjoying acting his role one bit.

"I need you to step in for me for a court case today" Elder Brother had told him before he had gotten to his usual ritual of digging graves. Let each body you bury be a step to your revelation the wise man had told him, bury away the deaths you've caused and in turn forgive yourself.

"I know nothing about court you oaf. The seven aren't going to tell me to convict the poor fellow or let him live" Sandor gruffly replied. But the bald aging man just smiled knowingly and patted him on the shoulder.

"This isn't a murder trial" Elder Brother told him with an infuriating glint in his eye, "It's a marriage annulment"

Sandor didn't know how this could interest him one bit.

"With all this chaos around who cares him some wench stays married or not" he argued back but the man just continued to smile that loathsome smile and proceeded to instruct him on where he should be and what to do.

_At least I'm not stuck digging graves for the whole day_ he told himself. All the destruction that had occurred meant there were a plenty of bodies to bury and he his work was quite laborious. _6 feet deep my ass_ Sandor thought, on days that he would receive a cart load of the deceased he sometimes resorted to four. _It's not like they will come blooming out of their graves like daisies _he justified.

After long last the court doors finally opened and in single file entered a small man, followed by a young girl with a hood pulled over her head and a Septa and a silent Brother as a witness in tow while Sandor made an attempt sit all pious and zealous and the rest of that bullshit.

It took only a moment for Sandor to register the identity of the short man. Petyr Baelish was known to him, often in the Keep before he had fled and had hardly changed in looks since he had last seen him. But the girl he did not know, but her height and figure looked familiar though he could hardly tell under than brown cloak of hers and that hood that she pulled over her eyes with her head down. They strutted up the rows to the front where Baelish issued the girl to sit on the pews with the Septa. He proceeded to unfurl an amount of paper work and lay it out on a great mahogany table. After he had finished settling things in order he looked up to Sandor waiting.

Sandor cleared his throat forgetting his duties and struck the gavel on the table with a force which made the young girl jump.

"Court in session" he rasped before leaning back in the chair already uninterested, even if he didn't know what Baelish was doing at a marriage annulment.

Petyr raised his hand to his mouth to politely clear his throat. About the same time the girl after making sure no one else was present in the courtroom the girl removed her hood. Sandor's eyes widened as he viewed the brown haired girl with Tully blue eyes. Her eyes captured his in a moment and he quickly diverted his attention back to Baelish.

"Brother" he started in a voice which Sandor considered to be annoying, "My daughter Alayne Stone was recently married against her will and we now wish to see this marriage ann-"

"Annulled" Sandor declared hammering the gavel on the table. Baelish's eyes snapped back to his hooded face as did every other confused expression in the room.

"I'm sorry- what?" Littlefinger questioned bewildered.

Sandor coughed. He didn't know what the Little Bird was doing here or why she was with Baelish but if he could free her from an unwanted marriage so be it. At least one of his attempts to free her would succeed.

"You heard me" Sandor repeated, "Annulled" and hammered the table reaffirming the decision.

Baelish looked back at him still confused.

"But I haven't even told you everything yet" Littlefinger pointed out, "You don't even know if she's a maiden.

_Bugger. Maybe I was a little too keen to set the Little Bird free_ he thought. He quickly arranged an excuse.

"The uh- Maiden has um... told me of her- erm... purity" he stumbled pointing to the heavens as if to rectify his actions. He cleared his throat once more.

"Continue" he ordered gesturing the laid out papers.

Baelish stared at him opened mouthed, even the Little Bird screwed her eyebrows in confusion.

"Right... well. As I was saying. Ahem. We wish to see her marriage annulled. Unfortunately the identity of her husband we can not reveal and the necessity for... concealment has caused us to come all this way to the Quiet Isles for this adjudication. The unnamed man however is well known and to ensure the annulment is certain we have decided to come to someone of... high authority in case matters are brought up before"

Sandor shrugged, the unnamed man he deduced to be the Imp, though he had no idea what Baelish's intentions were of annulling her marriage Sandor could see nothing wrong with it.

"Annulled" Sandor said, hitting the gavel on the table again. He liked doing that.

"We do have documents here to prove her maidenhood and a Septa if you need vocal proof" Baelish continued still surprised.

_And why would I need that- wait the Little Bird is still a maid? _Sandor stopped his eyes from drifting to her figure and mellowed his sudden desire.

"Annulled" he repeated hitting the table for good measure. He spotted several deep etched ring marks in the table's surface now. _Elder Brother is going to whip me for that one_.

Petyr Baelish sighed defeated but smiled back at the Little Bird.

"There you go Alayne dearest now you are free to marry Harry-"

Instinctively Sandor raised his arm.

"MARRIAGE NOT ANNULLED!" Sandor shouted before he could stop himself hitting the table with the gavel so hard it splintered in his hands.

Petyr stopped mid-speech as they all stared wide eyed and horrified.

_What the buggering hells are you doing! You can't get yourself out of this horse shit now! And what if he asks you to reveal your face! Then you're really screwed!_

"B-but you just said it annulled" Littlefinger protested almost childishly.

_THINK FAST. THINK FAST. THINK FAST._

Not understanding his own actions Sandor suddenly clung to the sides of his chair throwing his head forward trying to assimilate a situation where a sudden spirit had take hold of him.

"The Mother has spoken!" he cried out feeling like a fool. But there was something in him that didn't want to hear that his Little Bird had been married off again. Besides even if her marriage wasn't annulled who knew where the Imp was, her maidenhood would be safe for an amount of time.

They all looked at him in awe and curiousness.

"The Mother has spoken!" he repeated, "Yes the girl is pure in body but the Mother knows she is not prepared for marriage"

He raised his head to look at the Little Bird. Something inside her registered and he spotted something- thankfulness perhaps?

"She is a woman flowered she ready to marry" the Septa stood up obviously confused at his changing decisions. He raised a hand to silence her.

"The body may be grown but the heart and mind do not always mature at the same speed" he surprised himself with his choice of words. _I've spent too long in this place, its turning me in to an old sage_.

Littlefinger however was not so easy to convince.

"This marriage we are intending is of great importance your holiness. Please" he said far too suspicious for Sandor's liking, "Implore to the Gods again and ask them to reassess our delicate situation"

Sandor panicked, at this rate they would definitely question his identity. Who was he to say he heard the Gods speak? No the only thing he listened to was his instinct... and his heart. He turned into the direction of Sansa who awaited her future.

He thought for a moment more and actually prayed to the Seven that he had chosen the right words.

"This" he said indicated the girl, "This... little bird... I have been informed has suffered a cage and I believe this marriage is only sentencing her imprisonment into another cage. However... let her stay the night in the Sept and I will enquire again whether her marriage should be annulled"

He looked to the girl. Her eyes were like two full moons with blazing blue centres. Her pretty lips moved, mouthing his named. Not the Hound. Not a dog. Just Sandor.

Littlefinger squirmed in disagreement but Sandor could tell he needed this annulment and even if he had to give up his hostage for a night, if the marriage was annulled then his plans would continue.

"Father I agree with Brother" Sansa- not Alayne Stone, suddenly injected rising from her seat.

Littlefinger gave her a look which was hardly fatherly disturbing Sandor to the core.

"But-" he started, "Fine"

Baelish gave Sandor an intense glare filled with rage.

"Consult your Gods" he spat, "But I will be here the first thing in the morning ready to take her married or no"

The Septa stood as well, "I will accompany the girl for the night. I'll-"

"Unnecessary" Sandor quickly said, "She has nothing to fear. We are sworn and dedicated men"

_Well most of them are. I'm not. But that's no matter, it's not like I've ever tried to...bollocks with that. That Little Bird wants to be free of him. I can tell._

He hit the table once more with the gavel.

"Court closed" he announced as Baelish looking slightly defeated gathered the papers again, he couldn't argue with those who spoke in the name of the Seven, and definitely not to those he needed the approval of.

He moved off from the chair careful to hide his scared face under his hood. He took steps away before he changed his mind went back and thumped the gavel onto the table again.

The silent brother who had been shrouding in a corner the whole time moved forward to Sansa taking her arm and leading her away.

Sandor quickly fled the room as well marching back to his quarters. He needed to back bed rolls, food, supplies, a sword, saddle Stranger and get the hell out of there with his Little Bird.

_My Little Bird? _But he busied himself quick enough to forget all that.

Like lightning he got everything ready. Ignoring the silent brothers who could complain anyway and raged upon the monastery in his task.

After enquiring where they had kept the Little Bird (which took a bloody long while because the majority of them couldn't speak) he started to endeavour to her quarters.

On his way he was greeted by Elder Brother who had an old sword in hand.

"You'll be needing this" he told him action oh so wise. Sandor grunted and accepted the blade though he thought it would break if he hit it on a tree. But he softened and looked at the man grateful.

"Thank you" he told him. The man shrugged.

"You told me of your sins child. You told me of your Little Bird and when I saw her I knew she was the same person. You've left the Hound it's now time for you to make another name for yourself and I think she can help you"

"Buggering fool, I'm going to go and drink myself into a stupor then run away with her never to be seen. Don't even think I'm going to start to act all noble and shit" he retorted but the Elder Brother saw through him and his harsh words.

"Maybe. Maybe not" he commented, "But I believe I know what you'll do"

_Aye. I'll take the Little Bird and take her wherever she wants, to hell and back_.

Elder Brother put one last reaffirming had on his shoulder before disappearing.

Sandor wasted no time into opening the door of the girls chambers and saw her there standing... waiting.

He removed his hood and looked at her.

"Little Bird" he rasped.

She smiled.

Tonight they were going to fly.

**A/N: Fuck the police. I had to stop myself from adding 'Petyr Baelish could send all the gold cloaks on the earth if he wanted to he'd just kill everyone... Fuck the goldcloaks' Cause Sandor would so say that.**

Made this after seeing on some forum 'What if Sandor was the person who judged the case of Sansa's annulment'. Thank you whoever you were.

I made this because I wasn't satisfied with my last one shot. It was out of character a bit too much for my liking and lack literary conviction.

Three happy SanSan fics thats just not right. In the next one someone has to die.

Now excuse me while I imagine Sandor strutting to 'Killing in the Name Of'. 


End file.
